Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Marlyn


A few weeks ago I found out that my cousin Marlyn died. I was so sad and shocked to hear it. As another cousin, Jeanne, said, she was the matriarch of the family.

I'll never forget one of the times that I met Marlyn during a visit to Cincinnati. We made plans to meet at a breakfast / lunch place, First Watch. When I got there she was waiting for me at a table, facing the front door. She made such a special event out of meeting me.

Marlyn and I are related because our mothers were first cousins. She placed a great value on family, her immediate family of course, but also extended family. Marlyn was fun and open minded and smart. She was such a wonderful example of taking care of, and including family.

Marlyn's father, Julian, was a clothier in Indiana. I didn't know him well, but I do remember that for a brief time Marlyn worked at a men's clothing store in Cincinnati. The owners asked if she'd work part time after seeing her make selections for her husband and probably interact with customers. For other activities, I'm sure that she volunteered, though I don't know the details. Marlyn took care of her mom, who resides in Cincinnati, and was a wonderful mom to her two sons and grandmother to their children. She traveled with her husband Alan and was fantastic at entertaining. I have so many memories of family gatherings at their house.

One of the reasons that I enjoy my mom's side of the family is that there's never been a guilt aura around a visit or contact. There's appreciation, and more contact is always welcomed, but never the "why haven't we heard from you?" feeling. It's nice.

When I talk about my mom's family, I typically say, to explain my far flung connections, "I have a lot of cousins around my age;" "they're very cool people;" and "if I met them socially I'd like them anyway." I could do a better job at staying in touch. Now that it's summer, why not? It's important to know who you're from. I like those parts of myself.